Kimber Del Valle
Gentle healing and finding stability for yourself and your family after stillbirth grief.Few things in life drop you into a state of grief and trauma like feeling your body go into labor months before you expected, then hearing the words, 'I’m sorry. I can’t find a heartbeat.' Whether during the delivery or too soon afterward, infant loss requires us to find our way through the wreckage where joy, anticipation, and 'an already love' get replaced by numbness, confusion, and emotional pain so immense words cannot form.It’s a slow journey out of devastating loss, one that requires a caring community. On the way to wholeness, there are many questions: Can I get pregnant again? Are we done getting pregnant? What if our next baby dies? What do I tell our living children so they won’t get scared? There are also transformations required as grief gives way to the 'what’s next' and the 'new normal.'In Still: Making A Whole When Parts Go Missing, Dr. Kimber integrates her vast knowledge of psychology with her own painful loss of a 34-week stillbirth, making her uniquely qualified to address the complexities of pregnancy loss. She weaves together grief, anxiety, and trauma into resilience and inspiration, recounting the effects of losing her baby on her marriage, her sunshine child, and the need for her courage, strength, and a loving community to heal. This is her story of trying to make all of that 'whole' again. Perhaps you will find pieces of your own on these pages. Perhaps you will even be able to dig into what’s gone missing inside of you and discover what needs to be found.There’s never a perfect way to grieve loss or overcome trauma. There’s never a known outcome of your pregnancy loss. There’s only entering into it and stumbling through with the help of family and friends. When faced and confronted directly, grief and trauma dare us to keep living, feeling, and even, audaciously, to find our way to thriving.Let Dr. Kimber’s story hold the hope that what’s been broken can be repaired-not into what it was before but into something that you wouldn’t have imagined. Into something that has yet to be lived or have formed. When it emerges, you’ll know. It’s waiting to be found. Something that doesn’t yet have shape. As you pick up the pieces, it will find you.
